damaged

damaged

1 chapter / 296 words

Approximately 1 minute to read

Description:

I wrote this as a kind of slam poetry type thing. Just for kicks. Hope you enjoy!

Comments(4)

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over 1 year ago Haley Wingate said:

This was so powerful and so full of truth. You didn't mince words, but you said it boldly and I thank you for writing this poem. It was beautiful and exactly what I needed right now. The rhythm of the poem is interesting but smooth and the message is wonderful. Never stop writing! Keep up the amazing work. :)

Polar_bear

over 1 year ago Sydney Stapleton said:

This was good, it had a good message, but by the third paragraph it didn't seem like poetry anymore. It turned into actual story telling. For me, you lost the emotion there. If you keep this on the path it was on, short sentences, lil bursts of detail, then I think the reader will be able to connect to this more, find their own emotion along the way instead of you giving it to them. It's more poetic that way, if that makes any sense.

Magic fox profile legal with name2

over 1 year ago Naomi Folettia said:

Such a powerful piece with a great message. I feel a lot of people try to imitate others when the most important thing to do is to be yourself. You don't need to be someone else to live the wonderful life you want.

Great job on writing this! :D

Picsart_1444009293026

over 1 year ago Raven said:

OMG, this is great! Wow! I'm like freaking out right now! God! I can't stop shouting!

Reviews(6)

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about 1 year ago Stephanie Horror said:

I wouldn't know how to review this for you because honestly, I haven't studied "slam poetry" and don't even know what that exactly is...I usually thought poems had stanzas or just flowed straight down. So this right here is new for me and very, very enjoyable to read. I read nothing like this before. It was different, unique and had its own style which I admire. Your words flowed so smoothly and there wasn't anything bland about it. I believe a lot of people can relate to this, including myself, because you nailed every piece of truth in your lines. Excellent work here and your last line, however, really was a nice choice to end it all off perfectly. If you ever anymore pieces like this, I'd love to read more (anything you request) and thanks to you, I might have to do some research on this "slam poetry." It's very unique--at least the way you write it. ((: Hope you continue writing pieces like these in the future and never stop! Happy writing!

-Stephanie

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over 1 year ago Jay Kyle said:

The poem was really good! i really suck at poetry, so to me this is like #poetrygoals :) I rally like the part about giving in, it was really true. There isn't much to improve, since it was good, but because there's always room for improvement, maybe you could be a little descriptive? But it's actually really good this way,so you don't really have to change it