Intacta Imperium

Intacta Imperium

19 chapters / 57704 words

Approximately about 5 hours to read

Description:

NOTE: This is the newly rewritten version of my previous work, "Figura Mutante".

Trinity never understood why she could never make any relationship--friendships, romance, or anything in between--work. At least that was the case until she met Cooper, an animal shape-shifter with a deadly, secretive past. Suddenly plunged into a life of intrigue and danger, Trinity finds herself tangled in a web of curses, anger, secrets...and a plan that could mean total destruction for almost everyone in her world. But both Cooper and Trinity learn a great deal about themselves and each other as they travel all four corners of the earth (along with another boy with serious issues *cough, Drake, cough*) searching for the truth in the danger they find themselves facing.

Genres:

Writing, Fantasy, Novel

Comments(8)

Aliceb5 (1)

about 1 month ago Coral Vaci said:

(I read chapters 10-11) I laughed out loud when Drake said "-there are lots of animals and sharp things out there. Like Unicorns. They're both animals and sharp things."

Azriel? I remember him! So now we readers are getting a little more history on Cooper! Also, I hope they can get someplace safe because of what news Azriel told them.

I can't wait to see where you take this!

(BTW, when we get on the new platform I am more than willing to re-read and then comment on your stories and poems all over again! :D)

Aliceb5 (1)

about 1 month ago Coral Vaci said:

(I read chapters 8-9) Nice character building! I feel really sorry for these guys and can't wait to see what will happen next!

Aliceb5 (1)

3 months ago Coral Vaci said:

I read the two new chapters. Wowzers!

I'm really liking how you rearranged the story so far and I'm so happy that Trinity, Drake, and Cooper got out of the clutches of death! :D

I can't wait to read more!

Img_3492 (2)

3 months ago Samuel Roberts said:

Whooooaaa so okay does Trinity die or not

I mean she's the protagonist so not likely but then there's Drake

This is why I don't watch movies like the Hobbit as they come out cause I can just binge watch all three later and not have to be in suspense

Reviews(5)

Center

3 months ago Lauren Fricke said:

I very much enjoyed this! While a tad slow in the start, the piece is interesting and pulls readers in. I didn't notice any glaring technical errors, and the characters are believable.

The one thing that struck me was your change in tone/writing based on the character's POV. I'm sending you a major high-five for that. It added to the piece and highlighted your abilities as a writer.

Apologies for not having any critiques, but I couldn't find any!

Congrats on your contest win!

Better

3 months ago A.G. Wade said:

CHAPTER 6

Always leave the first line of the chapter by itself. For instance:

'Trinity didn't know how she did it.'

SPACE

'Afterwards, she even doubted that she did..."

Avoid starting sentences with 'but' if you can help it ;)

hehehe, I admit I laugh everytime at the description of a very shocked Drake XD

Avoid starting paragraphs/sentences with 'It'

Quite a bit of internal dialogue...maybe break it up with some Drake babble?

Maybe elaborate slightly on exactly how Cooper uses his willpower to control the demon?

Perhaps put "Revenge." and 'Now he knew that wasn't true(.)" by themselves?

So...Cooper forced himself to leave Ferguson alive, whom he hates, but didn't fight for the innocent people the demon destroyed afterwards? HmMMm o.O

'clutching the little stream of " << I think you meant to put blood here XD Also, clutching at a stream of blood is a bit of awkward wording...heh...

All in all, an exccellent chapter ;) I think you've done very well with a difficult chapter to write. My biggest concern is the internal dialogue, everything else can easily be taken care of with a brief editing session, bahahaha XD Looking forward to the next. ^.^