The Wolfhound Man

The Wolfhound Man

2 chapters / 2835 words

Approximately 14 minutes to read

Description:

Have you ever glanced at a dog and wondered,"Does he love me as much as I love him?" Maybe not in the romance type way, but what if he was really a man? A man stuck in a dog's body? This is a story about a dog who falls for a human. But will secrets keep their bond apart?

Romance. Mystery. Fantasy. Drama. Tradgedy. Adventure.

*WARNING-DO NOT READ IF YOU LIKE PICTURING THE CHARACTERS. BELOW INFORMS WHAT ACTORS AND ACTRESSES I PICTURE THEM AS.

Characters/Cast
Johanna> Emma Watson
Benjamin> Tom Hiddleston
Clauf> Jeremy Renner
Terrance> Josh Hutcherson
William> Orlando Bloom
Alice> Emma Stone
Elizabeth> Mary Steenburgen
Richard> Theo James
Jason> Dennis Quaid

Genres:

Writing, Fantasy, Romance

Comments(7)

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9 days ago houli said:

I would like to apologize first off - I completely forgot that I had promised you feedback on this!

But what I like most about this story is the characters - Benjamin is very relatable and I love the pack mentality you've portrayed so far. Good job with this!

Ki

19 days ago Soggy Kitkat said:

I like how the love interest is introduced right away. The story is interesting so far, and I can't wait to read more.

Midnight hyde profile edit

20 days ago Prince of Terakruka said:

really good story!!! benjamin is really relatable! make more chapters soon.

Image

25 days ago Rebecca Maen said:

Love this book! Are you going to write more chapters?

Reviews(4)

Ki

19 days ago Soggy Kitkat said:

I think it was a really good start! I have questions, however, maybe they'll be answered later or maybe you'll go back in and clarify, but is this a world where humans can freely transform into wolves once they've grown or gained that ability, or is this a world where there are different races, one being purely human, and another with human forms, but also transformation abilities. Also, another question that may be answered later, a better description of the stone, or like what it is. There were a couple mistakes, spelling, punctuation, etc., but I haven't even gone back to proofread my story, so no judgment there, but other than that, I think the concept of the story is really new and fresh compared to other stories I've read and I'm excited to read more!

Blooming heart

24 days ago Vera Wolf said:

Chapter 1 Review

I like how in the first line, you subtly establish that the mother is not human by describing her white fur. Given the title, I immediately imagined a white wolf as well.

"...that was patched* with snow and frost..."

"Through his blonde locks he could see his week old brother, now already the size of Ben's leg..." - suggestion. Even with third person narrative, try to keep the camera from his perspective (hope that makes sense).

"Stay close, Benjamin" - [paragraph break here] It looks like you might have put one but the spacing isn't coming through. It might be tedious, but that would help with the read. That little white space is a metal break for readers to pause and digest what they've just read before moving on to the next paragraph.

In the 2nd paragraph, I think it would help if you compared his size to her. You describe her tail wrapping around him. As in the length of his back, or his waist, or his entire body?

Judging by the way he speaks he is not a toddler, probably closer to 9 or 10 would be my guess.

"Most of the clan" - ah, so this isn't the case of a human child being adopted by wolves then. Interesting. So they're shifters then?

"as if she were scared" - this feels out of place. We're told she's afraid, but given no physical description of that fear, or reason justify it. Wolves are not naturally violent to their partners. Then again, maybe shifters are different.

"...she yawned and rolled onto her back..." - this indicates trust, not fear. I'd remove that comment from the previous part.

"The she-wolf's ears* perked..."

"Silence passed like death..." Okay this whole last bit of the paragraph needs to be built up. Also, the fact that Benjamin is asleep conflicts with the way the story seems to be presented from his narrative. And the way the mother wolf is killed out of sight so abruptly...doesn't really give us a chance to feel and connect with this loss.

Perhaps the father goes looking for her after the gun shot, which would probably wake the pups if its loud enough. His return could confirm the mother's death and then Benjamin could start to process his grief. It's just too rushed as it is.

"...Clauf's aqua green eyes glared down..." Clarity needed, I wasn't sure at first given I don't know Ben's eye color.

"...like the rest of you."....[paragraph break] "Clauf shook his head and laughed bitterly* (suggestion). "What exactly does that mean."

"Clauf places a large hand on his (son's) shoulder as he shifted to face the sky above.* Thousands of stars twinkled.." - suggestion. Clarity and fluidity.

"Since the owner..." I have no ide what this means. Gravis Stone was their home but now some owner has taken control of it and put them in danger? How much time has passed since the Mom was killed? How old is Ben anyway? Is the family leaving? If so why wouldn't he go with them, just because he can't shift yet doesn't mean he should automatically abandon his family, or that they would abandon him. I'm not very clear about what's going on.

"...that was years ago..." I'm assuming they've moved since then, given how close his mother was killed to the den.

I'm confused about how his father talked about the mother like she didn't matter. Honestly the dialogue in this spot is confusing.

"pondering what his clan was going to do without him." - sounds to me like staying is your choice kid.

"he spooted grey hair rising along his arms" - so the boy can shift now. How is he so different then? Also, I think if you added the physical sensation of the phase it would feel a tad be more realistic then, "oh, I've sprouted a few gray hairs."

Okay, They're going to take Gravis Stone (this a town, building, piece of land?) from his mother's killer. This part makes sense, but if that was their intent, then how was his father acting like his mother didn't matter. Sounds like this is his way of helping the clan and getting revenge.

If they're going to take over this guys house, won't they have to get rid of the wife too? Just a thought.

Why torture the guy? Why not just kill him? He shot a wolf, probably didn't know it was a shifter, killing him would make sense...not sure what this purple vial does.

"He knew he couldn't stop what was already put into motion" -umm, yea you could. You howl, bark, make some sort of noise to alert the human so he isn't poisoned. Or kill him yourself to make it a quick death.

"...and a picture that put Benjamine floating on a cloud..." - really, your about to murder, presumably torture the man who shot your mother, but some picture of a girl will transcend you above the moment? *scoofs* okay, if you say so.

"Quick, I found him" - who is speaking [paragraph break if not Ben] Hesitating* (capitalization)

Why didn't the guy wake up during the scuffle, what are the odds he'd be such a heavy sleeper.

"reached the vial and handed it to Clauf" -at the start of this paragraph his father already had it. Confusing.

"Clauf poured the remains" - I didn't know it got spilled so this confused me.

Why would they leave Benjamin behind like that, doesn't that leave them exposed? So much for family first. Perhaps this murder is more motivated by greed or cruelty then revenge. And what the hell is Ben just doing sitting there...no sense of self preservation. Good cliff hanger though.

Last note. For all the description of the girl we got in the picture (photo or painting btw?) we got no description of the man sleeping. And, after being forced to drink something, you'd typically wake up. And if forced to drink poison, you'd probably have some sort of physical reaction, even if its minimal, depending on how long it takes the poison to kill you. Usually the quicker the more severe the reaction. Yet we were given nothing aside from his foaming at the mouth. Some trashing, moaning, spasms of his limbs, pallor of the face, blood shoot eyes staring wildly would give this man's death more impact. Hope this helps