Battler

Battler

6 chapters / 6625 words

Approximately 33 minutes to read

Description:

A sci-fi-ish steampunk-ish story full of fantasy violence. Cover by the fabulously lovely Halle. NOTE: This version is chock-full of mistakes, plot holes, and stupid little details. I have a fully edited, updated version elsewhere, which I will publish at a later date - perhaps not until it's done. Meanwhile, if you do find any major plot holes, PLEASE DO point them out to me on my wall. This is my major project and I need all the help I can get. Thanks.

Comments(18)

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about 5 years ago Elisa Xu said:

Really great job! I can't wait for you to continue! :D

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over 5 years ago Xavier Kent said:

Battler has exactly ten more words than Inquiry does.

Duck

over 5 years ago Alyson Duquette said:

This is really great, Stella, although I've only read the first chapter. It's a really cool idea and I look forward to finishing the chapters that are posted. :)

XO,

Aly

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over 5 years ago Xavier Kent said:

My comments make me happy too, James. STELLA YOU PUBLISHED A NEW CHAPTER I LOVE IT bahahaha Kepe throws up the poor bastard

Reviews(1)

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over 5 years ago cassidy said:

The first chapter is the only one I've read, but I will read the rest as soon as I can.

Okay, so..to the review.

The description is flawless, and that takes a lot of skill. Some people put too much, some put too little, but the amount of detail in this is perfect from what I've read.

There aren't any errors that I saw, and that's one thing I loved about this. I don't have to correct you on anything.

One thing is that two or three sentences seem a little awkward, like: "Axra felt like arguing. But she knew he was right." I just think they would be better merged, because it makes me halt in my reading, if you know what I mean. This is just my opinion, however. You don't have to change it. It just seems to stop the flow.

It's quite amazing, and it's a really creative idea. It's original, which is another thing I like. The names, like Skrint for the creatures, are creative and I love them. I also love the name Axra, and Krepe.

Great job, and I look forward to reading more!