Life in an English Project

Life in an English Project

2 chapters / 1233 words

Approximately 6 minutes to read

Description:

This is the story of Mariska Christian Scott and ordinary girl living in New York City. She was given prompts for an English project and was expected to describe her life.

Genres:

Writing, Memoir, Novel

Comments(2)

Headshots 026

almost 6 years ago Marceline R. said:

That was really interesting. I was a little confused through the end of the second chapter, though. I think it could be a little less sudden, and I felt a bit visually lost. But all around, really good job.

Dark-angel-the-moonlight-31000

about 6 years ago Clare Sarah said:

Also forgot to say, sorry for being rather negative, but you did ask for honest reviews. One other note: I didn't understand why this was titled "Life in an English Project". If this staying as a two chapter short story, that needs to be explained more. Or if it's longer, I'd like to see what happens and why this is about an english project.

Reviews(17)

Arianna

about 6 years ago Arianna West said:

this story is very good. it caught my interest, i was kinda hoping that it would be longer. the story seemed to mainly give details about her life but they all flowed very well into describing what happened to nathan. but i think you can give more details about your characters, give us more of an insite about them but other than that it was a very good story and in my opion one you should continue

Jueda_transpacifica

about 6 years ago Ami Chan said:

Ok I'll start with grammar or confusing mistakes I saw divided by chapter.

Birthright: After you state the character's name, you say, yes I was born in the United States. That's a bit awkward, because it doesn't necessarily flow. There should be a comma after head in the second line of the second paragraph. The taunt from Brett should be in quotes. The part where you describe she's an accident, there should be a semi colon to prevent run on sentences Kindergarten should be lowercase. It's too shy, not to shy. And its should be it's near the end.

Debt: It is financial issues, not finance issues. Central Park should be capitalized. It should be felt like, not fell like when the NYPD comes in.

Overall: I think you should work on not using contractions, especially if this is supposed to be your character's English assignment. I really like the premise, especially the name with Law and Order: SVU (Love that show by the way). But really, work with a flow. I feel like you jump on a little bit of everything. Especially in Birthright. You don't have a word limit, so play around with using good descriptions.

Wow this is the longest review I have ever done.