Sickness

Sickness

1 chapter / 107 words

Approximately half a minute to read

Genres:

Poetry

Comments(6)

Figavatar

over 5 years ago AAK said:

That was great! I loved the way it all just flowed.

Lily

about 6 years ago Living Hope said:

My only thought is that "dammed" is spelled "damned" unless you meant it as pent up. However, you put a lot of effort in this so it was very good. Nice job.

Horse-riding

about 6 years ago krystelle faulkener said:

Wow that was powerful. Lovely imagery and metaphors.

I just think the all capitalizing breaks the flow a bit, so maybe use italicizing instead of all caps? and I think it's guilt, not gulit. And I also love the line about the butterflies.

Img_1649

about 6 years ago absentminded_artist said:

Wow, just wow, beautiful emotion. very powerful and (a word i can't remember)

keep up the good work!

~E.

Reviews(1)

7thpias 01.03 - copy

about 6 years ago Rachel Hera said:

This is so wonderfully written. Amazing. Towards the end, the capitalized words really emphasize the point you're trying to make, and the phrases you used -all of your wording -is phenomenal. The only thing is instead of "GUILT" you accidentally have it as "GULIT" :P Wonderful job!