about 1 year ago B.C. Doyle said:

I like this a lot!

over 1 year ago Eowyn said:

This is a really sad, and touching piece. Most stories of suicides tend to be about someone with nowhere to go, and nothing to lose. You added a twist, her own world, and her own friend. You wrote about a girl with somewhere to go and everything to gain, which really made it an amazing story.

One thing: She mentions the boys at school a lot, but you never see them. The time she spends at school is not very detailed, which makes you wonder how bad it really is, and you could addd a lot to the story by writing a couple of specific scenes like you did with the mother at home.

All in all though, it was a heart touching story, beautifully written. Great job!

over 1 year ago IDH said:

This is a really well-thought-out story! It's an idea I've seen before but you manage to add more to it and that's what gives the piece success. Good work!

over 1 year ago Emma [InTheClouds] said:

Thankyou so much for all the comments and feedback, everyone! I really appreciate it :)