Limerence I

Limerence I

1 chapter / 103 words

Approximately half a minute to read

Description:

A poem on a want.

Genres:

Writing, Romance, Poetry

Comments(13)

Emo-girl-camera

over 6 years ago Charlotte Jordan said:

This was written brilliantly. The details are perfect and the imagery is amazing.

Penguins

over 6 years ago Alex Knight said:

Wow. This is a very bold piece. I really love how you describe everything; the imagery is great. This is a great poem. -Alex

Img_4419

over 6 years ago Charlotte said:

wow. your imagery is great! good job!

Boston

over 6 years ago Sara Elizabeth said:

Dark, powerful, sexy...I really don't have anything else to say for you. This is awesome.

Reviews(3)

Corner1colorblack

over 6 years ago Sam G said:

The diction is at a very high level, and I appreciate that. Much like many advanced works, you managed to jam a lot of detail and emotion in the very small space of about 100 words. I was forced to read it twice, which is a good sign. I had not been expecting any deep imagery or metaphor, and the ones in it were prime examples. However, I feel that it should be properly capitalized to round it out as a more serious piece. The lowercase makes it seem rushed in feeling, which is good, but also in effort, which I don't like. The conciseness of the poem conveys any urgency just fine.

Kat_thumbnail_large

over 6 years ago Kat Asharya said:

love the beautiful, sculpted nature of the language of this poem. it has a nice, dark undertow to it -- i get the sense of desire, but also a predatory quality. the one bit that took me out of it was the parenthetical expression (floodgates to the soul bit). i'm not sure why...i think it's because the narrator is so strong that it doesn't seem like they'd "think" in asides. does that make sense? probably not, ha ha! anyway, a real pleasure to read.