Hidey Hole

Hidey Hole

3 chapters / 2767 words

Approximately 14 minutes to read

Description:

minimalist style.

cover by Unparalleled Paralysis (Thank you so much!

Genres:

Writing

Comments(9)

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about 5 years ago Kira Martin said:

Aww... This is so cute but sad. It totally feels like a 5 year old's voice.

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about 5 years ago R. Abbas said:

This is for a swap This was genius and captivating. you make the reader craving more, and more and more> Your a very talented author, your writing is unique and personal to You!! Great job!! If you havent already can you heart mine?

Long hair

about 5 years ago just_a_thought said:

Desiree used the perfect word, "precious". It truly was. The story had a strong voice and was very realistic. Great job!

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about 5 years ago Desiree Rousey said:

This was absolutely precious. I love how well you portrayed the small child, and his voice and the way he thinks is extremely accurate. I love how he has Crazy Jane--maybe she's a sort of mother figure for him? I'd love to see this as a longer story. :D

Reviews(5)

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about 5 years ago Jenni said:

That was adorable. I loved the character's voice, and how you made it seem so realistic. Crazy Jane is intriguing and I barely found any mistakes. There were a few slips in the third chapter - mainly missing words/letters, and mix-ups between there and their, but pother than that I couldn't see anything. I'm sorry this isn't much of a review, but there is nothing to improve on! That was excellent and you should write more!

P.S. This was for the proofreading - could you read over Blind Hope (the one without a cover) and make a note of any mistakes? It's for a competition, and I'm terrible at checking these things ^.^ Thank you!

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about 5 years ago Alyce McKnight said:

This is great! The voice is absolutely amazing. I love this little boy and I want him to succeed. Crazy Jane is also an interesting character. I love the fact that this story is told through the eyes of a little homeless boy. At the end of the first chapter when he said that he was lucky I almost cried. It just showed how much we take for granted. I think this is great. I did notice that you use a lot of commas and there was a spelling mistake. It said, "durning" instead of "during". Otherwise, I absoultely love this and I really hope that you think about publishing this when you finish. Good job! =)

-Alyce McKnight =)