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Approximately 9 minutes to read
over 4 years ago E. L. Jenae said:
First of all, I wish I had put on 3D glasses before I looked at the cover because now I am moderately blind. Second, I enjoyed the description very much! It was like being in the center of all the things you wish you could have but knowing you couldn't reach for them all at once.
almost 5 years ago Aurora said:
Wow. I don't really have any criticism to offer you. Just happened to stumble by this and I'm so glad I did. You have this style of using somewhat disjoint sentence paragraphs that I love - you don't give away too much and that keeps the reader guessing and wondering about what each character is thinking. I think that there is just the right amount of ambiguity here, and I love the changing between "we", "I", and "you". Your style here, despite this being a prose piece, reminds of that of a poet's who I've had to study at school - her name's Carol Ann Duffy. She's a british poet, and she uses the "you", "I", and "we" a lot. She's also got the same ambiguity and disjoint sentences. You should look her up - I think you would enjoy her writing. Fantastic job! =)
almost 5 years ago Ingrid said:
This is INCREDIBLE. Everything about it makes me gape in wonder.
almost 5 years ago Arabia "Another Girl" Knight said:
Each chapter held something different. Like a real Ampitheater.
almost 5 years ago Wholockian said:
I wish Figment had more reactions cause I have so much more to 'react' :P
This was bloody amazing. I'm not even kidding, I don't see why you don't like it. Alright, first chapter I think needs to be worked on a bit, just the descriptions and sentence structures. You also missed out the word 'name' in one sentence in Chapter 1.
I have no criticism other than that, cause it was just that brilliant. I'll be honest with you, since you're typically pretty good with your reviews, I was preparing myself for something... not this. I was wondering what you didn't like, and how I'd give you a teensy bit of advice to change it. But dear God, I don't see what you didn't like. I don't.
I loved how cryptic it was. How it told you a story, but withheld details. How it told you about characters, but didn't. Let you get to know them, but didn't.
It was like a person in itself. Cryptic. Enigmatic. And absolutely NOT meant to be deleted. Got that? This is genius.Pure genius.