First Kiss

First Kiss

1 chapter / 210 words

Approximately 1 minute to read

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Comments(21)

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over 4 years ago Caitlin said:

Please write more! I loved it!

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over 5 years ago mishty said:

This is AWESOME! I could some how see it happening.

Paris

over 5 years ago Emily Drew said:

This is beautiful. It has a lot of emotion for such a short piece. It flowed well and I loved the romance. :)

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over 5 years ago Wynter Page said:

Oh My Gosh, you have floored me. I love this, it's so romantic and yet so short. You've literally captured the emotion of butterflies and I felt like I just read an excerpt out of a riveting romance novel! Once again, I envy you!

Reviews(2)

Aphrodite4

over 5 years ago Maya Marie said:

Truly fantastic. You captured all the emotions running through a person's mind at the moment of a first kiss. The thoughts, the actions, the emotions. I felt like I was right there with the character. Feeling, experiencing, everything. Fantastic job.

Unknown

over 5 years ago secretgirl227 said:

This was great!! It perfectly captures the moment of the first kiss. Also, you never get the guy's point of view. If you decide to write a book where a first kiss scene is needed: please use this!! The only comments I have are grammatical. Make sure when you write things such as: I don't know what I expected, but I was surprised... You need to change it to ...what I had expected, but I was surprised. The narrator expected before he was surprised which took place in the past. Therefore, expected happened before the surprised in the past so you use the past participle to make it so that he expected before he was surprised. Hope this makes sense and if not let me know!