For the Love of a Girl

For the Love of a Girl

1 chapter / 1075 words

Approximately 5 minutes to read

Description:

*please heart & comment for the Justine Mag Contest! * This is my retelling of the greek myth of Eurydice.

Comments(6)

Lightning

over 5 years ago Azondrielle Kat said:

This is great! I love the touches of despair that lurk throughout the whole story! I love your characters and your dialogue, although the beginning was a bit choppy. Overall, nice job and good luck in the contest!

Music lover

over 5 years ago Miranda H said:

The line about "The Underworld of Hollywood" made me laugh :) This was a very interesting concept, and I'm always a sucker for mythology. The writing felt a bit stilted and I wasn't sure whether you wanted to use a modern voice or a voice that fitted the mythology aspect. That, of course, is only my opinion and can be taken or left as you see fit. Great job, and good luck in the contest!

Figmentavatar

over 5 years ago Carolina Garza said:

Love this! I love mythology and this was a great interpretation. Best of luck in the contest!

426804_398915436834723_1597151422_n_large

over 5 years ago A Girl That Writes said:

this is really beautiful! good luck in the contest!

Reviews(2)

Images

over 5 years ago arachnidsGrip said:

Another person who loves the Classics! I'm not alone! This was really impressive. You had me hoping, as I always do when I read this story, that maybe it'll be different this time. Maybe they'll make it this time. This was beautiful. Keep writing!

Coast

over 5 years ago HT Fallen said:

Return for Distance:

Here are just a couple of things that I picked up on as I read. Feel free to use or disregard as you see fit.

"I know[] I signed a contract..." I feel like this would be better without the comma. As it is, it's very choppy, and though the comma could technically be there, I think it reads smoother when it isn't.

Watch out for comma splices. "I love him, [and] I want to be with him."

H. Ades? Nice. :)

"In on Orpheu[s]" You have a typo

Yikes, that's harsh, H.Ades. You did a great job with this, though. Sometimes, the writing feels a little bit stiff, but sometimes that's just the way it works out better. Keep up the good work!