The Descendants

The Descendants

19 chapters / 62737 words

Approximately about 5 hours to read

Description:

Denton Academy is a little different from your average, everyday school. It's a place where you get an A for shooting to kill, and your principal applauds you for deceiving him in a lie detector test. Jayden Torrez, his girlfriend, and friends all go to this school, a secret CIA operated campus that trains teenagers into spies for the government. When Emma, a friend from Jayden's past, shows up she brings trouble with her in the form of a villainous organization looking to take over the school and all the highly trained spies inside. Can Jayden protect everyone he cares about and stop the murderous threat, or is this mission's consequences too high for this spy-in-training? For when you live in the world of spies and assassins, life is never boring and definitely never safe. *please review*

Genres:

Action, Romance, Novel

Comments(24)

Me writer

almost 4 years ago VMJaskiernia said:

I like this. I assume it's YA, and I'm also going to assume you're allowing for a little bit of Hollywood leeway as to the realistic nature of how things work. A sewer tunnel is rarely large enough for a whole person, for instance, and knocking someone out with a chop to the neck isn't realistic, and would cause a fair amount of damage.

Your characters are good, realistic. They're teens and act as such, I like that. You're descriptive and the writing voice is a good one for teens.

This could be a popular YA novel :)

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almost 4 years ago Ben Thomas said:

I meant in the first chapter...

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almost 4 years ago Ben Thomas said:

Hey, Good approach. Nicely written. I liked when Ty runs his sister up for that one-minute scenario.

There's a slight spelling error at the last line - 'you're' instead of 'you'll'.

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over 4 years ago Danielle Haveta said:

I really like this. I did not spot any grammatical errors that I remember and I dont think that there were any spelling problems. Really good though

Reviews(12)

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over 3 years ago Emmit said:

Okay, here's my review.

The paragraph that starts with, "Light flooded over them suddenly as the cover was lifted aside." The sentence has something confusing. It seems you mixed where with were. Thats all. I am filtering through this chapter, and I love all the character formation you got going on. I could imagine everything. I don't have any problems with the way you wrote it, and it looka quite fancy with all the long chapters. Your doing quite a good job with thia whole thing. Thanks for the read, I hardly found anything to correct!

Patrick

over 4 years ago Rebecca said:

I'm a bit busy at the moment so I skipped right to chapter thirteen for the scene you mentioned. I am VERY impressed, you describe the action really well and the pace is fantastic. As for Jayden experiencing an attack of claustrophobia, it was extremely well done. I could completely identify, and even if I had never experienced it myself it was easy to imagine how if felt. The transitions in and out of the flashbacks were really smooth as well, and describing how Bailey helped Jayden to breath as "an anchor" was perfect; that's exactly what it feels like. I hope to read the story as a whole at some point but for the moment, at least with the claustrophobia thing, you're definitely on the right track!