Supernatural Summer

Supernatural Summer

2 chapters / 519 words

Approximately 3 minutes to read

Description:

©2012 Summer Reading Contest Finalist! Aria has to spend the summer at her grandma's, but a horrible memory on a summer night ruins it all...

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Comments(266)

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over 5 years ago Lw said:

This feels so great to read and I love what you done with the opening

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over 5 years ago Kyla Marie Rich said:

Wow. That was creepy and well written. Nice work! ~Kyla Marie RIch : )

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over 5 years ago Colin Lierman said:

...wow. That's all I have to say. It was quite an eerie piece (which is the kind I like!) and nicely written. Altogether, I enjoyed this piece! :)

Dog behind fence

over 5 years ago Mary Nichols said:

Congrats on being a finalist and good luck!

Reviews(54)

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over 5 years ago Colin Lierman said:

While I do believe this to be a good story, and a well-established plotline, it seemed to me to be a bit short. Maybe a bit more with her and her grandmother, or a bit more allusion to Aria's previous "incident." Other than that, very nicely done!

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over 5 years ago Nikos Tsakas Jr. said:

Look, I don't mean to be harsh here but your story has a little room for improvement. I get the feeling that you have a sense of situation, but you can't give your description that "flowing" feel. Try to change the verbs and adjectives you use and read out loud, to see if it actually feels smooth. Your dialogue is good and your descriptions show skill. And you have a nice sense of story. I do feel like everything is a little too rushed, but I don't know your world limit so I suppose this might have been longer if you were allowed more room. Try to make it feel natural. Be a reader as much as you are an author. This is good, hard work. Just take some time to make it better. Always strive for perfect! Good luck with all your future writing endeavors! Cheers! :)