There's No Such Thing As Angels

There's No Such Thing As Angels

5 chapters / 2246 words

Approximately 11 minutes to read

Description:

Madeline has never believed in fantasy until one day she wakes up finding out that she's an angel. With Madeline trying to control her angel powers and wings, love comes rushing into her life. Sebastian likes Madeline. Should Madeline keep her inner angel a secret or will her evergrowing romance show Madeline to be who you are.

Comments(8)

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over 4 years ago Beth Noblitt said:

This is really good. I really wish there was more detail, like how did she get angel powers? You could really expand on this. Overall I really liked it.

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almost 5 years ago Jackie Everdeen said:

I love the story idea but it kinda feels like its being rushed! Loved reading it though!

Tennisplayer[1]

almost 5 years ago Alexandria Presscott said:

This is good! I noticed a few spelling mistakes and it was slightly rushed at times but other than that you did a great job! I really liked the idea and thought it was very interesting! Although, it kinda reminded of a book I read recently your story was different than what that book was about. Nice job and you should keep writing this! ~ Alex

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almost 5 years ago Brianna Drummond said:

I think this has potential, but I feel like right now you are just scratching the surface. I would have liked more emotion, more show and more details. I feel like things are happening quickly too and adding in details and putting more personality behind your characters will help that! Good start.

Reviews(4)

Nemo

almost 5 years ago T.Kristen said:

**Swap for Keep Your Enemies Closer and another story of your choice**

I really liked the idea of this story; it's cute and the beginning is really well written with good descriptions of clothes and such. Though, I had a feeling some things were being rushed and some things felt like they were missing.

The first chapter was pretty well thought out and I liked your transition into the subject of the angels, but the chapters after that, you can tell, were fairly rushed.

Also, I think her reaction to discovering her wings was unrealistic considering she didn't believe in these 'fairy tail antics'. Otherwise, it's a really good story and original and with a bit more thought, I think it could really live up to its full potential.

Writing picture

almost 5 years ago Kirsten said:

Swapped for Good Girl:

I think that this was a good start to your story. It was cute and a nice concept. I've read a few angel stories and usually it's about the boy being an angel and the girl falling for him. It's nice to see a refreshing twist to the usual angel premise.

I think that your descriptions of her surroundings and clothes are written pretty well and helped me visualize everything quite clearly.

However, I think it needs more fleshing out. This is a could base for your story, but it needs more. I understand that this is in third person, so we can't really get inside your character's head. However, third person perspective, I find at least, is very flexible. If your character is nervous, explain how she feels. Were her palms clammy? Her heart rate accelerating? Her fingers trembling? All this can be used to describe the simple sentence of, "She was really nervous" and enable the reader to connect with your character more easily. Show us the story, not tell us.

Also, I found her reaction to having wings a bit unrealistic. She never believed in fairies, angels or things like that, as you stated earlier in the chapter. Why would she be so willing to accept her wings? If I woke up with wings, I'd think I was dreaming or gone crazy. I thought that her reaction was a little rushed and unrealistic.

Other than that, this was a cute start and I like the fact that you used cliffhangers. The plot was creative and original, and with some more fleshing out I think it can reach its full potential.