The Boy Factory

The Boy Factory

1 chapter / 925 words

Approximately 5 minutes to read

Description:

*Thanks everyone for the kind comments! I'll be thinking of expanding this soon.* Analiah works at the Boy Factory, overseeing the programming of each new man born in the Feminist Empire. But one day, a shocking mistake leads to the beginning of a Rebellion that was under planning for decades.

One day, Analiah creates Gage.

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Reviews(5)

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4 months ago Rebecca Maen said:

PLEEEEASE write more, I love this story! I was confused at first, but now I want to read more!!

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about 5 years ago L. Schmidt said:

Raine,

This is an interesting piece, that left me craving more. I really loved how you handled the part in the factory as the boys roll long the conveyer belt. It sounds like the plastic boy business rivals Mattel and Ana and her counterparts are overworked and underpaid. How else would they have mindless created a boy with free will?

Speaking of, I wanted her to react more to the form that had "free will" on it as a requirement. Yes she's shocked at saying it, but it must be just as shocking to realize the words are actually written there and somehow got through all the sensors. Given how fast the Feminist Police arrived, they have to be reading the requests as well. How did the rebellion seed it in?

Like the reader below me, I was also taken back that marriage so young was a requirement in this society. Ana's reasons for not wanting to join with an "empty, perfect husk" made perfect sense, but the idea that it was a societal ideal threw me. The Insta-connection she then feels for Gage then feels a little forced. Yes, he's the first man she's ever met with free will, but their bond seems instantly romantic whereas I could see it starting out more as that of a mother/child. She brought this boy into consciousness with her words and feels a responsibility for him. She knows the Feminist Police will take them both away, her to be imprisoned, him to be killed, and she can do nothing to stop it.

Which leads to the bookends of this piece. Clearly they escaped, are together, and joined up with the revolution, but how? I wanted a clue or a line to offer up how they went from being surrounded to breaking in to a main government facility.

Good luck with the contest. This is definitely one of the most unique takes I've read.

Like Veruca Salt, I want more. :)

L