Dream Walker

Dream Walker

7 chapters / 8368 words

Approximately 42 minutes to read

Description:

Elizabeth is an average teenage girl - and she has one foot in the world of dreams. But what happens when dreams can no longer be told from reality?

Genres:

Fantasy, Drama, Horror

Comments(125)

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over 4 years ago Linda Dionne said:

First of all, I want to just say that this is such a beautiful story.

Your writing is smooth and it really captured me and pulled me into the story. Your description of people, settings, and objects is great. It's interesting while not breaking the flow of the story. I love your style of writing too. It's beautiful and kind of creepy.

One thing, though, is that your MC is not as developed as the rest of the characters. We don't know as much about her personality which makes her less interesting. Maybe try to add more about her.

This reminded me of a book I read once, called 'Leap'. It was about a girl who could traverse the dream-world and her friend was trapped in the dream-world. She had to get him out before he was permanently trapped there. Your book has the same mysterious, creepy, magical, and, well, dream-like quality as this book and it has the same kind of plot too.

I'm following you because I love this story, so keep writing it!

Dragon1

over 4 years ago Levi "bookwyrmknight" Keim said:

Really interesting first chapter. I'm ing to have to read the other chpaters later.

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almost 5 years ago Trundling Wombat said:

In the third chapter, there was a slight lapse in tense consistency: "I turned in a circle until I found the dresser ... I opened the jewelry box ..." This is in past tense, while the rest is in present. I LOVE the third chapter!!! We get to see it from Collin's point of view! Yay! And holy guacamole cliffhanger at the end! KEEP WRITING!!

11-20 no more braces2

almost 5 years ago KEM said:

That was amazing, Evie!! Again!! Just finished the second chapter and I think I might die without a continuation! This minute!

I adore the way the story is told. And your descriptions of the characters are super gripping. I love reading about what characters are doing: how they are sitting, what they are holding, how they turn to look at someone else; and you portray them perfectly - in a way that I can envision every second with perfect clarity. And the ending was super awesome! I also really love the story because of her name - Ellie! :) That's my nickname!! :D

Colin is such a sweetheart. One of my favorite kind of characters are those supportive friends who tease but still show such concern and he is definitely one! I love him already! And she rocks! I can already tell! :D Definitely a heroine (my favorite!)

Super duper wonderful, Evie! Fantastic! Can not wait for more!

Reviews(29)

James henry matthews the second's portrait

over 4 years ago Lexi said:

Chapter 5:

Okay, so this chapter was alright, but this chapter was not as exciting/suspenseful as the other chapters. Really, I think in this chapter, you should have Colin's POV and deal with This Falone character like he said he was. I think it would work fine in the end when Colin comes back (I don't know the story line, so if Colin doesn't come back, then keep it the way it is). So when he comes back, she can be all on his case and you could have her ranting how worried she was all day and whatnot. This is just a suggestion, so you don't have to take it. This chapter just didn't hold my attention as the others had.

I didn't see any grammatical errors here when I was reading, so that's all I've got for chapter five today! Happy writing! :)

James henry matthews the second's portrait

over 4 years ago Lexi said:

Chapter 4:

Whoa, that was AWESEOME! I liked how it started out and slowly glided into where she met Falone. He must be the evil character in this story, right? I don't like him all that much. OMG, I couldn't believe they were about to kiss! No! She should be with Colin! Not with this Falone character/person! *not so silently fuming* I also liked how you had Colin's words slip into the conversation just a bit, like 'help' and 'please' and 'Elizabeth'. That added the suspense to it and kept me reading! You did absolutely amazing!

You did not! No! You did not! I was going to go on and read chapter 5, but you know what I got? I need an access code! Grrr! Lol, I really like where you're going with this and when you read this, please remember to give me access code so I can continue further. I really like it and I enjoy it very, very much! I must read more, lol!

You've really got me hooked into this story! Great job and have a great day/night!!! :)