I'll Stand By You

I'll Stand By You

12 chapters / 13038 words

Approximately about 1 hour to read

Description:

His future is free. She's had a noose around her neck from the day she was born.

Genres:

Writing, Romance, Serial
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Comments(214)

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9 months ago Egypt feince said:

i love your story

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about 1 year ago Alexandr Lukin said:

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almost 3 years ago Mursal said:

I love how detailed this story is and how much effort you put into it to make it descriptive. Nice job!

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over 4 years ago Maria Krause said:

I'm usually all for 'show, don't tell' but you do the telling so well I can't help liking it.

So now I'm thinking there's two possible outcomes. One, you tell us some more of their relationship and Diane's struggle to tell Ricky the truth and the obstacle it creates in their relationship, only to end it with her taking the test and it turns out she doesn't have the disease and they live happily ever after.

And the more likely one, outcome #2: the disease itself is an obstacle in their relationship, not just Diane's struggle to tell him the truth and, well, as much as they want to live happily ever after...

Oh, well. I don't even know what I'm hoping for. The first one would just make the whole story a cheap trick but then the second one is just too sad :(

Ahhh. Still, I'm glad you updated! Looking forward to more :D

Reviews(23)

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about 3 years ago Willow J Flynn said:

I really like what you have here, I read the first two chapters and they really interested me. I think that you have the dialogue down very well, it fit the characters. I also really liked your descriptions. They were enough to give a solid image of what was going on, but they didn't go on for too long either. I didn't really see anything that I would recommend that you change or adjust. Great job!

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about 4 years ago Charming Quill said:

Chapter 3-Tracy

Right off the bat, I see you use I or She or Name of Character to start a sentence. I understand the “He’d” bit is purposeful, but the rest isn’t. Maybe try switching up your sentences and the word order.

“One more step, and she’d have tripped over her” it took me a few times to figure out who she and her were. Maybe add in a name to clear that up.

I like the voice and the plot right here. I’m assuming this is the disease Sophie referred to and the reason no one will marry into their family. No one wants this in their children. That’s powerful.

Only one other thing caught my attention, repeating words and occasional phrases. Try to eliminate as many of these as possible. Re-read, catch them, and rewrite them.

All in all, this story is heating up and getting interesting. I like the turn it’s taking. Great job with the voice and the way you write your characters dialogue.