Timeless night

Timeless night

1 chapter / 3335 words

Approximately 17 minutes to read

Description:

♦Inspired by RP between me and Kristen Cervantes Writer of the white Sages :) ♦
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Hawk (Aadon Jr) Is the one and only WereHawk in the Western Clan of Werebeings. When The Poachers force Hawk to send his wife ahead he must go through an Odyssey of a journey to reunite with his wife and clan. But....will the journey though Poacher land change him from who he truly is?

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Comments(7)

Pichachu

about 5 years ago UnAngelic said:

Grammar's a little off and you should be more specific about who says what, I got a little confused. But the storyline was good and the characters popped out; nice job. (:

Cutecat

about 5 years ago Leafwing said:

I love the story of this; I can feel the emotions of the characters and it's subtle how you slip in little pieces of information without dumping it all at once. Some proofreading might be in order, though. Otherwise, great job!

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about 5 years ago A Girl That Writes said:

i really like this :) your writing was really strong throughout the story and i found myself enjoying the read :) great job on this and i hope you continue with it soon! :)

Doctor

about 5 years ago written_voice said:

This is really interesting. I think it had a nice plot. I really liked the description of this piece. Nice job. :)

Reviews(2)

Dsc01108

about 5 years ago Laura Aliria said:

You can't be heart-broken and emotionally dead at the same time.

Also, "Tho I was a large man [INSERT COMMA] 180 pounds 0f muscle, I've never felt smaller.

..I want to comment inline. Grrr.

Ry

about 5 years ago Ryanne Kap said:

Interesting premise. As you know yourself an enemy to the "Grammar Nazis," I won't have to elaborate on the grammar and spelling mistakes. An issue I'd like to address is the lack of separation between past and present. There were a few times when the action seemed random and unprecedented. I wasn't able to get a good grip on what was going on; it was a bit confusing. Like I said, interesting premise.