1 chapter / 81 words

Approximately half a minute to read


Drama, Suspense, Poetry



almost 5 years ago Lindsay Tracy said:

Interesting! I like the twist at the end - it caught me off guard!


about 5 years ago Simone Tilmon said:

nice inquisitive writing I love this poem and ur writing style


about 5 years ago Veleka Georgieva said:

Well, given that I've just just read one your earlier works, I can honestly say I see a gradual improvement in your style! Good work! Keep writing, 'cause apparently you have a telnet!


about 5 years ago Linda Giron said:

I love how simple and concrete the idea of this poem is, at first I was afraid at how it might read being free verse (sometimes I'll read free verse and it feels a little awkward), but I was delighted at how great the poem's rhythm is! Great work, seriously! :D



about 5 years ago C. R. Steinberg said:

This was good. It kept me reading, and I think you really did a good job with it. But I get the feeling that you didn't spend enough time on it. I think you should review it, and make sure you like the "flow" of the poem. It seems kind of rushed. I like that it is short and simple, with that feeling of giving the reader quiet questions. I just think you should work on keeping that short and simple theme without making it seemed rush, but I don't really have any advice on how you could do that :/ Also, considering there is little punctuation in this, maybe you should consider putting a question mark at the end of the last sentence. It may make that final question seem a bit stronger. You did an excellent job on this poem, and I really enjoyed reading it! Keep writing and improving :)