Chasing Robin

Chasing Robin

6 chapters / 10979 words

Approximately about 1 hour to read

Description:

Shurewood, Nottingham’s citizens can be classified under one of two groups: rich or poor. Charity Barnsdale is filed under the first. Her mother is the sheriff and so the town respects her family, even after the accident, even after what she did. Charity finds herself stuck in the past, reliving her mistakes over and over again. Her parents barely ever acknowledge her existence, making the guilt feel even more overwhelming. She wants to prove to them that she’s not just a screw-up, but, most importantly, she wants to remind them that she exists, and this Robin Hood fellow is just the guy she’s looking for.

Larkin O’Leary’s family is not so fortunate. They live in the slums of Shurewood, right by the forest. They too are haunted by their pasts, of the loss of someone they loved. Larkin works three jobs to help his mother with the expenses. Everything he does is to ensure the safety of his mother and younger siblings, and so when their debt keeps increasing, Larkin feels as if he must do something. He dons the hood and raids the night, soon becoming known as Robin Hood for his feats of “stealing from the rich and giving to the poor”. But there is one thing Larkin didn’t count on; Charity Barnsdale.

Genres:

Romance, Novel, Adventure

Comments(11)

Black bird

over 4 years ago Aviline said:

Update me when you continue.

Black bird

over 4 years ago Aviline said:

Amazing! I love the idea of this, adding a character and warping the time period. I love Robin Hood!!

Weird_at_last_by_armeleia-d6ipbio

over 4 years ago Madeline T. said:

Swap response: Nicely done, very well-written and interesting. The only thing I noticed was that you misspelled "Sherwood," but I'm not sure if that's intentional or not. Otherwise, excellent work. Keep writing! :)

Images

over 4 years ago Calypso Kaden said:

The prologue is really cool! I like how you describe the gossip. Nice job!

-CK

Reviews(2)

Figgie by christy s

over 4 years ago Lyric Mera Brand said:

PROS::

I enjoyed this opening. I think it’s a very interesting way to open and it wasn’t too much telling (which is what happens with most prologues). I like that Charity kind of wants all hell to break loose. It adds to her character and gives me a bit to relate to in Charity. Sometimes I wish all hell would break loose too.

I think that you have a great voice and your characterization’s really strong. For example, I love how Larkin explains how everything seems to fade away, how it no longer exists. I think it’s a good insight on how he shoots, how he keeps his focus.

I also like your dialogue. The banter between Johnny and Larkin is realistic and cute. They talk like real friends.

Your showing is very well done and your characters really developed. I like how you showed Charity’s relationship with her parents and the bit of bitterness she has for her dad not even asking when she got a job.

The way you end your chapters is really great. I think you have a very good hold on your mood of suspense. The end to Chapter One is absolutely killer, it keeps your reader wanting more.

CONS::

In the first chapter, you talk about how Larkin knows the parents are judging him. How does he know that? I don’t think it’s a very good representation of the rich judging the poor. I’d suggest that the parents don’t wave back. I’d have them simply ignore Larkin, having one or two of them roll their eyes or shake their heads or something.

In the line “I laugh. ‘The fact that I practise?’ ” “practise” should be “practice”.

OVERALL::

I really like the little twist you’ve given an old tale. Bringing it into a modern light and making the Sheriff of Nottingham a woman instead is a very nice twist. I think your plot is interesting and that it has so much potential. I look forwards to finding out more about Charity and watching Larkin become Robin Hood.

-Lyric Mera :)

Iy2bsw

over 4 years ago Parfait said:

prologue why does she want all hell to break loose? Because she's tired of her life? Because she dislikes people? Why? What do the characters look like?

chapter 1 Why is a poor kid babysitting rich kids? There's no wall between them? What do the characters look like? So is the store just a normal store? Is Joe rich or poor? Is it expensive or average? Why doesn't charity go to a rich person's store instead if it's just an average store, isn't it further from her house if it's for poor people since she lives in the rich people area? wonderful cliffhanger good job, keep writing.