The Current

The Current

3 chapters / 3851 words

Approximately 19 minutes to read

Description:

Rated M for some graphic imagery, language, and the use of alcohol and tobacco.

Joseph Harding is attached to Earth's surface; he goes almost every night. And yet...he wishes he could be there all day long. When Joe finds letters written by his grandfather, he believes a secret message may be found within. And he's right: hidden in the letters is the first clue on an enormous scavenger hunt that spans the entire network of caverns beneath the surface that will eventually lead to a source for a new shield to replace the defunct ozone layer. The only way to travel between caverns? The mysterious wind tunnel known as the Current. Where will it take Joe? He doesn't know where it goes.

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Reviews(1)

Winter

over 6 years ago PretendLikeI'mNotHere said:

Let me begin with the characters. The way you started it and the dialogue exchanged between them all gave this sense of liking toward them. Nelson and his out-going, crazy, annoying yet jokster attitude made you instantly like him but also recognize his level of immaturity. Joe and the way he is so confident in what he does and getting what he wants, as well as the sweet man who cares about his kids but also has this nagging small conflict with his wife; it all made you respect him as the main character, one a reader can trust and always keep their fingers crossed behind their back, "I hope he doesn't die, I hope he doesn't do something stupid, I hope...I hope...I hope...". Job well done on the intro and characters, because the way they seemed so real, with true life, made me want to keep reading.

Okay, secondly, I think the writing and forshadowing is coming together in just the right timing and rythm! All the pieces kind of come together in a slow yet exciting way. I also like how it isn't too predictable, and for those readers out there who want something to keep them on their toes instead of knowing the whole future plot after the first chapter, this story fits those needs.

I don't nag about spelling or grammar, personally it's annoying when people comment on that or little random words of commas that I missed. Just wanted to let you know though, I enjoyed reading it just like an edited novel, with little to almost no mistakes!!

And lastly, my one, small little suggestion: sentence flow. It felt a bit choppy (at times, not all) and at some points of the story it made things confusing and caused me to want to skip ahead. It's a small thing because I didn't find it that many times, but just keep it in mind ;D

All in all, this is the longest review I've ever written, and it was for an incredible story that I REALLY HOPE YOU KEEP WRITING AND UPDATING!