Want to follow along with this writing? Sign up Today, it's free and easy
Approximately about 1 hour to read
**FINISHED** Dracula managed to trick his pursers and ended up getting trapped in his tomb for 200 years. Now, released by accident by an exploring teenage girl, Kat, he is free to wreak havoc on a world that doesn't believe in him. But Kat, who bargained for her family with her own life, has to stay with him, teach him about the world he now lives in, and never try to escape or cause trouble for him. Kat wants nothing more than to escape - but as she spends time with him, she realizes Dracula may not be the monster of legend. ©WhitneyHall 2013 **Thanks to ~Metal-Night from DeviantArt for the awesome cover!**
almost 4 years ago Selena Brooks said:
This is usually not my type of story (I don't do horror very well!) but I must say you really captured and held my interest here. That in itself is probably the highest compliment I can give, since I am extremely picky about what I read. Beautiful style and descriptions!
almost 4 years ago LR said:
I read Stoker's Dracula for the first time this past semester, so I really liked how you brought in the characters (like Mina) and followed how the story went. It sort of brought in realism to me, oddly enough. I read the first couple chapters, and I really enjoyed it. I like how you described Dracula. My only critique was that in the prologue, she just appears in the catacombs of the castle. I wanted to see more how she got there. Other than that, great piece of work!
almost 4 years ago Hilary said:
I only had time to read the prologue and first chapter, but I definitely wanted to read more. This was a good horror story. Great job.
almost 4 years ago Lauren Owens said:
Sorry it took me a day to get back to you haha! I ended up reading all of it! I couldn't put it down! So awesome. Fantastic job, I just loved the whole idea of this story. Well done!
almost 4 years ago Marti said:
I did it. I read it all! That was so much fun ^~^
I love your style of writing. The dialogue was pretty good and the storyline was cliché but excellent. When I read the epilogue and got to the ending, I was freaking out. I was like, "She can't be finished if that happened!" Either way, I think you should make a sequel of sorts. The flow was a little rocky and good luck with your editing. My only suggestion would've been to have had the German sentences followed by the English translation in ( ). So that way you can see it up front and not go back. So all in all, fantastic job.
Best of luck!
almost 4 years ago Melissa Moreno said:
I only had time to read the prologue and chapter one, but I've got a lot to say. First of all, the prologue has so many exciting material that it could be divided into three chapters. That way, you would have more space to introduce your character and her obsession with Dracula, and show her trip to the castle. Every thing happens way too quickly in the prologue. In fact, the part where she turns around and see Dracula should be the end of a chapter. And the chapter after that should be her making the deal. This is all preference and you don't have to accept my advice but I just think the pace of the story would be better that way is all :)now, about the deal. I find it hard to believe that she wouldn't try to run away first. Why is she so quick to give her life away? That needs to be more realistic. But I do like the idea of her being stuck with him and him needing her in order to get used to the world. Once Dracula steps outside, you should describe the culture shock he goes through. He should be FLIPPING OUT haha and make Kat a little more miserable. She did just sell herself to a vampire. If you want me to read more chapters I'd be willing to swap some of my short stories for a few of your chapters. I just don't have the hour right now to read all this right now