A Lovely Argument

A Lovely Argument

1 chapter / 816 words

Approximately 4 minutes to read


An argument between a child of the fey and of mortal magic. Both in love with the other but family setting them apart. One-shot.


Writing, Fantasy, Romance



over 4 years ago Dreaming On said:

This was good writing, but I feel like there needs to be more of a story here....


over 4 years ago LR said:

I thought I would take a look at this story of yours since voting is still going on for this contest. I loved the banter between James and Laura in this piece. I think you definitely were able to show their differences, answering the prompt. Great work and Good luck!


over 4 years ago Christina said:

I really like the banter between the two characters, but I found myself wanting more than just the dialogue. I want to have more setting, more description, more plot movement. We get world building in the dialogue, which makes it tough. That said, I think this could definitely bridge towards a longer piece where you could explore all of this. Great job!


over 4 years ago Elizabeth James said:

AWESOME JOB!! Keep writing.



over 4 years ago LoLo said:

Okay, This is what I noticed:

1.) Twice in the story you said Laurs, and twice you said Laura. I don't know if it's a nickname or typo, either way it's confusing. 2.) Talk more about their background relationship. Maybe add an italic memory in the beginning. 3.) What type of magic is it? Talk about it more to get the reader interested. 4.) Where does the argument take place? Right now, it seems like some haunted hall or something. That's what I imagined. 5.) Also, I think that James sounds like a vampire. If that's what he is supposed to be, well done. If not, explain the character.

And That, is all I have to say. :)


over 4 years ago Ikhwan Hassanat said:

I have nothing much to say just that, this story is just nice and sweet. it hit the spot. Stoyrline is good. I like how you combine magic and real time. Very well done. =)