Sunflower Girl

Sunflower Girl

1 chapter / 268 words

Approximately 1 minute to read

Genres:

Writing, Poetry

Comments(9)

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about 4 years ago Paradisefiggie said:

This was such a great poem, I absolutely loved it, especially the last few lines, I think those are some of the most important (besides the first) in a story they leave an impression on you read an you did just that, you left a sunny impression on me, it's such a cool idea that you've got here and I enjoyed reading it. -ParadiseFiggie-

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over 4 years ago Marissa LaPorte said:

This is such a beautiful poem, such a creative idea too. I don't have any advice or suggestions to give you, it's perfection. :)

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over 4 years ago Twilight Stevens said:

This was just simply beautifully perfect :)

Mxm forevs

over 4 years ago Hilary said:

This was a very creative poem I liked very much. It kinda reminded me of California girls, only flower style. Power to the flower!!Keep writing, and sorry I can't really critique anything, but I don't know much about poetry.

Reviews(1)

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over 4 years ago Kennedy Simone Marx said:

Okay I don't say this often but I absolutely adored this poem. Everything about was wonderfully written in a way that made the idea fiercely original even though it have not been. I felt like this was one big metaphor and story at the same time like you could be describing a person or documenting the life of a sunflower. Anyway, your worst lines: You twirled in the sun washed mornings." I'm not sure if sun washed is correct it seemed awkward and at first I thought you meant to say watched instead. Use sun bathed instead so it's clearer what you're talking about. Also the line :"Your timelessness brave and beautiful" I don't know timelessness seemed awkward to me but I don't think that there is anything to replace it. Now onto your best line:"Thoughts scattering like dying petals" I really loved this line because when I thought about it it made perfect sense and reminded me of my own thoughts. Overall wonderful poem, I really enjoyed it and it made me happy.(: