18 chapters / 37678 words

Approximately about 3 hours to read


Castir, is just your average teenage thief, he works with a circus of thieves. He was abandoned by his mother when he was a baby, he quickly learns the skills of an acrobat and uses them to steal information and artefacts vital for the rebels cause.


Writing, Action, Fantasy



over 4 years ago Kierstyn said:

Wow, you did amazing with this! I love the details you put into it, and the idea around it is great!


over 4 years ago Sajambbu said:

The idea is amazing, i love the whole thief bit, and them running along rooftops evading guards. You should really organize your paragraphs though, space everything out


over 4 years ago V.ROSE said:

Interesting, I only read the first three chapters and I was hooked. I really liked the characters, but the over all plot of the story is amazing. The detail is just spectacular, making the imagery come to life. Lovely Job!


over 4 years ago Krystal Fragoso said:

Love the concept! It's very unique. I wasn't able to read it all, but what I did read was great. Your characters are very strong. I think that in the beginning, make that long paragraph into shorter ones. It makes it easier for the reader. This story definitely has a ton of potential. Love the cover, too.


Summer hearts

about 4 years ago Summer Kingston said:

Prologue: This is a great start. You have some odd comma placement and you have a tendency to put commas where they are not nessecary. The last paragraph should be: "Hello, boy," it said, then it lunged. In addition, you have choppy sentences (such as the last two sentences) and run-ons (second sentence). Just try reading through and you can probably find most of these. You have very good descriptions and the prologue is an excellent way to bring the reader into the story.

Chapter 1: You once again have unnecessary commas. Try to italicize the letter to set it apart from the normal narration. You tend to use the name Castir a lot, rather than using a pronoun. This was fine until the end where you repeat the name multiple times in the same sentence. Your speech tags are wrong in a couple places, but otherwise this was also well-written. You really began to develop the characters and you included good detail.

From what I've read so far, this is a very interesting and well-written piece. You have werewolves, bandits and ringmasters which sets the story up in a unique manner. The plot and your detail is very good and I can't wait to read more.

(I have to go, but I'll review more soon.)


over 4 years ago Faith said:

So I have only read as far as the first chapter but I already love this story. I can't wait to read more :)