Violetta Falls

Violetta Falls

2 chapters / 8319 words

Approximately 42 minutes to read

Description:

The once world-renowned opera singer, Olive Degarmo, is collecting dust in early retirement, reminiscing about her glory days and looking for a place to put her footing. The limelight and cadenzas still call for her, but can she go back to a career that left her marked by tragedy and heartbreak? {Cover by the brilliant Nivedha}

Genres:

Writing, Drama, Romance

Comments(12)

Laasya blue butterfly

over 3 years ago LATHiSH said:

This was a beautiful story, and I enjoyed reading this. I have read the first chapter and I felt that the word flow was good and hence I was able to read the rest with a good imagination. The imagery in the story was pretty good. I enjoyed a good reading, thanks for sharing. Have a nice day!!!

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over 3 years ago Jessi Elliott said:

Well that was one of the most descriptive figment words I've read! Just be careful you don't use TOO MUCH detail that will bore your reader to the point they stop reading because there is a good plot developing here I think and I'm curious to know where this story is going.

Best Wishes,

Jessi

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almost 4 years ago Jasmine Shabazz said:

Okay I have to say that your descriptions are amazing. Everything is easy to visualize but you also pull the reader from the present a lot. I think you put in to much background into a small amount of time.

You also have a tendency to prolong specific details. For example when you mentioned her ex-fiance. Don't go so much into the "other woman" because it's an "if"(an uncertainty and is presently irrelevant). You show a lot which is good but sometimes you just need to be simple and say, "She sits alone in a room that she hasn't entered since her fiance left ten years ago. Her fingers are idle among the ivory keys of the piano. She frowns at the sight of his face. It's printed on the cover of a cd and it's the first time she's seen his face since she bought it five years ago."

Try not to overdue everything because that's what drew me out of the story a lot. Think about each chapter having an individual climax. What would the climax be in this chapter? How do I lead up to it?

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almost 4 years ago Jeanatte Hkm said:

This was well written, you put a lot of description which is good, but your paragraphs are huge and sometimes I just want you to get to the nitty-gritty if you know what I mean. But, if you wanted to create an emphasis on her piano playing then you accomplished that. Anyway, good use of imagery here. Just try not to overwhelm the reader with too much description and maybe make your paragraphs smaller.

Reviews(8)

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about 3 years ago Michelle Labelle said:

I read some of the reviews here and I really wish that those who only read the prologue had also read the next chapter. I personally don't really take issue with lengthy exposition because I know it's set up for the rest of the story to come. It's starting with the ending and then showing you how we got there. However there are moments when you are repetitive in the phrasing that you use, which is easily solved with a thesaurus. Otherwise, I felt you were very effective in creating the nostalgia and depression of a has been. I also love the relation of Meera and Olive and the pep talk she gives her before the show was very moving. All the little clues you set up along the way helped me feel the emotion of that moment and the build up to that reveal was great. I am interested to see the rest of Olive's arc.

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over 3 years ago adiedo said:

I've read only the prologue and a few of the comments/reviews, and I must say I agree with some of them. You have a great vocabulary in this novel, and it all ties in together beautiful, but it does drag on a bit. If the reader is not extremely interested in opera, they will probably get bored easily. Sometimes it's not always a good thing to show off how many awesome vocabulary words and descriptions you can create, because when it comes down to the basics, you just gave us this woman's whole back story without anything actually happening. It was written beautifully, but nothing happened. Overall, I think you have a great vocabulary and a talent for description. I'd say to just work on the actual progression of the story. Make something happen. :)