The Gift of the Dreamseer

The Gift of the Dreamseer

70 chapters / 121762 words

Approximately about 10 hours to read

Description:

Link to map: https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B9gokEmqu_Hyek9QdVRZVzc0NGs/view?usp=sharing

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Link to illustrations:
https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/0B9gokEmqu_HyNURZbDFrUjNYdms?usp=sharing

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This is still a rough draft! Feel free to point out any plot holes, spelling errors, etc.

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CONTENT WARNING: Contains graphic depictions of violence. Recommended for mature readers over 13.

The Gift of the Dreamseer is a fantasy novel that follows the story of multiple characters during the late years of the lengthy war between countries Abicia and Dehrwany. Mya Carrahym is an Abician Dreamseer, a person who see the future in their dreams. She begins training as a mage’s apprentice even though her dreams tell her it is not her destiny and despite her attempts to avoid the war, she eventually gets drafted in as a battle mage after Dehrwany breaks the no-magic treaty. Meanwhile, in the country of Marazzin, Ketrech, an intelligent and talented mage, hires the infamous killer Fera Danizzar as his assassin in attempt to break into the palace of the Empress to find her forbidden spellbook - the only thing that could possibly resurrect his dead sister. Sandryn F’nett, a writer and adventurer, travels to the country of Cassamyr to find the woman he loves - the powerful but insane queen and dragon rider, Tristine Dennin, while his brother Tayvin commands Abicia’s army and his sister Elyse plots to take over the kingdom.

Genres:

Action, Fantasy, Novel

Comments(43)

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27 days ago ThePenMaster said:

Chapter eleven - It looks like your chapters are having difficult with the formatting. Are you using M-Word and then transferring the chapter over to Figment? The spacing for the indentation is a bit distracting.

I also feel like Mya's thoughts during her vision for this chapter at the beginning could have been switched until after she had woken up.

Looking forward to all of the characters meeting each other in the future.

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about 1 month ago oilly said:

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about 1 month ago Naki Lashiva said:

Hey! I like your edit at the end to solidify that Aldere died...that was amazing ;)

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about 1 month ago ThePenMaster said:

Chapter ten - “Strange,” he said, “I have never even met her.” – I would consider merging this into one sentence to make it flow better. Perhaps he could say this with a raised eyebrow to show his curiosity. “He ripped the letter open,,” – you have two commas here. "I am not sure why you want to come." I feel like this entire letter could be written in a different way. When Eirel tells the history of the war, I would suggest flashbacks or something. Maybe have one of the characters able to show what happen here and there. Not enough to overwhelm the reader, but enough to get hints. You have magic in your land, right? I would think characters can use magic to tell history and show people images of it. The last sentence feels a bit awkward. I would suggest rewording it.

Reviews(152)

Summerpro

1 day ago Hazel Gatoya said:

And we are back in business. Chapter 16...

Elyse, for such a manipulative person you sure can be dumb. Or just proud. You don't walk amongst the poor in fancy stuff, that's just begging to be mugged.

"Was this a good idea?" NO. There's obviously a point to this, but I'm not sure what it is. It looks a power play.

"You will got get the money" You've got an extra got in there.

"You mean those plans that she didn't tell you about?" Thank you! A more perceptive member of the family. The only one, it's looking like.

She never thinks anything through, does she? She's extremely lucky that that worked and that they didn't try to hold the prince for ransom or something.

I knew it. I knew that was what she was going to do, and I'm hoping that her men fail, or that the dude in the corner is a spy or something.

Chapter 17

Hey, Tayvin. It's been awhile since we've had a chapter with him.

Does Avaminn just not like magic altogether? First Dreamseers and now healing makes it seem like that's the case. And I've seen the result of people with very high pain tolerances. It doesn't end well, usually.

Two swords, huh? Cool. And yeees, let's see this battle.

I think that this is the first time you've mentioned Kalysta since chapter two.

They brought the big guns, so to speak.

That was actually a pretty good description of what was going on. The Dehrwany have women in the army too, I see, and know when to fall back.

Well written as always.

Red1

1 day ago Red said:

Chapter 24:

An Elyse chapter...this review will consist of 95% bitching about Elyse and 5% actual content. I have only read the first word, but this I can guarantee you.

"Elyse looked very out-of-place as she walked into the tavern"...holding up a sign that said, "I am a dumb foolish girl, please kick me"

"Despite her regal appearance, no one looked her way"...yeeaaah, I don't believe that.

"They can be fun to kill though", any normal person would at least notice her after hearing that remark. Either Elyse is exceptionally stupid or...no just option a)

Again...no advance...no plan rehearsal...no instructions as to usage of weaponry...just 'Kill em'...'kay'...

Auron: "I was worried I wouldn't make it in time."

Me: "Mate, who're you talking to?"

Auron(ignoring the heckler): If it had not been for Empress Ce'dan's spells...

Me: "No one asked you!"

Auron(whispering to the heckler beyond the set): ("I am already giving exposition in a very clunky way and I don't need a heckler pointing out inane nitpicks...Shut up and listen")..."I could have been days late."

Mmm...that assassination was very lucky to say the least.

"How foolish she was...", oh shut up, Elyse.

Ok, I read the whole chapter and I have a lot to say about it...

The entire plan was dumb to begin with...I know that's what you were going for, but it has to be believable on some level...something that explains it all, some context that makes it all believable...

E.G If Elyse had contacted two professional assassins...made a deal with them to kill the Prince in SOME amount of detail...and then found out on the day of the wedding that they had gotten tipsy due to one of them getting married or something and realizing that she has to compromise with these two idiots...that might have been more believable...or any other plan to be honest.

Second thing is...both Elyse and Arelus made colossal flaws in their plans...I believe Elyse's side needs no re-iteration...you never tried to make her the least bit smart in planning this entire thing...

But Arelus made even a bigger mistake in telling all of his plans to someone HE KNOWS TO BE A BASKET-CASE. Arelus may or may not care about his brother dying and it honestly makes no difference, since the relationship between the two brothers was non-existent...the point is if you wanted to make him seem like the soulless, calculating young prince...you half-succeeded.

Arelus is indeed merciless...but he still told her that he knew that she was the one responsible for the whole thing.

1) This is unnecessary.

2) "I have no use of telling anyone what I heard here."...then what's the point of informing her that he knew?

3) I am going to stop here, since I have no confirmation other than Elyse's delirious ramblings that he's after the throne too.

Some of this might be over exaggeration, but it feels like this was very rushed and not at all well thought out. Sure, maybe Elyse gets put in her place...but for what reason? Being an accomplice for murder...or being an idiot about it...only one of them would actually be satisfying to read about.