Providence: Elementals Rampage

Providence: Elementals Rampage

39 chapters / 140236 words

Approximately about 12 hours to read

Description:



STATUS: COMPLETED
Chapter 19,31,33-36 are undergoing polishing. They are readable but I prefer new swappers to not read them till I finish polishing them.

Cover by: vrai

The first book in the Providence series.


Yuki Mancio just moved into Abayant City, A city that discovered a material called Abayant X which can give people super powers. Power users or Elementals can use earth, fire, wind, and water powers.


Although an elemental himself, Yuki also has a one of a kind power that allows him to see the future which places his life in jeopardy when two rival organization groups, Magician's Pentagram: An organization of Elementals and mind control and Cluster Tech: An organization of Advanced Machinery and Cyborgs wish to use him to tip the scales in their favor.


Yuki meets up with his sister Cherise Mancio and her partner Alex Kypel upon his arrival at the city who are members of a special group called Providence who preserve the peace and handles all Abayant X related crimes.

Comments(23)

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8 months ago Naki Lashiva said:

Hey, this is a cool idea! It was this book that originally made me interested in a swap, but that's totally okay :D

I read the prologue and some of chapter one--nice writing style, btw :) You are very clear about what is happening. I'm assuming Yuki is the main character though, and I know it sounds silly, and it's just a thought, but you might consider rewriting the prologue from Yuki's point of view as a child, and really getting into his psyche in those early years.

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over 1 year ago Sophie Purchase said:

** For my review, not the book, sorry, I tried not to waste you review section, ended up wasting the comment section, I'm terrible (-w-")

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over 1 year ago Sophie Purchase said:

*Thirty is meant to be thirsty, just gonna add that in there

Trin_aster_pro

over 1 year ago Trin Aster said:

I usually gives reviews, but since I am tired and have been reviewing stuff all day I have decided to just read it then tell you some stuff after.

-"He (keeps) seeing" not kept.

-Why would the kid be excited he saw a man in his dreams that is now dead?

-Grammar could be polished

-Sorry this comment/review stinks really bad. Just there were some places where you could add description, or some places that could be polished up or changed just slightly that it would make it that much better. Overall I realllllly liked the prologue! Lovely job.

Reviews(407)

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2 months ago Kaylee Bowing said:

Chapter 17

1. Why does Yuki have to have Kim take him to these places? I mean, if Yuki can see these places in his mind then can't he just find them and go there on his own?

2. It's senora not seniora, but also like I said in the previous review, I feel like Jordan's character isn't really realistic.

3. ...he followed the Spanish's gaze...

It would be Spaniard's gaze.

4. How come Alex could hardly move, but it was super easy for Jordan to escape from the vines?

5. I do like Jordan as a character, but I don't necessarily like how he's portrayed. My mom lived in Spain and is fluent in Spanish and so I hear a lot about Spanish culture and I hear a lot about Spanish culture in other countries and I'm not sure if Jordan's character is accurate necessarily.

6. How come Len can only have three orbs at a time?

7. Remember to put commas in the right places when it comes to dialogue!

8. I'm confused about the part where Len said he made his pet cry and then Cher rushed over. Did she think that he was talking about Yuki or something...? Because it seemed weird of her to just rush over and into a trap.

9. So what exactly is Len's power? It seems like he makes weird orb bombs, but I'm struggling to figure out what that has to do with being an elemental. Or is he not an elemental?

10. Why was Kaito blushing when he stabbed Jude? Is he blushing because Jude accused him of being a traitor? Because blushing about that for one is super weird, but also it's not Kaito's style to really blush about that. Also, it's just weird to blush while you're stabbing someone in the stomach.

11. Aw snap Kaito just got stabbed too. o.o He should've been paying more attention, haha. Although I know that he doesn't die.

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2 months ago Kaylee Bowing said:

Chapter 16

1. I feel like you should be careful with using too much Spanish for Jordan, just because in real life if someone is from Spain, like I suppose he is, they don't necessarily talk like you have Jordan talk. We've had a lot of interns from Ecuador and stuff stay at our house, and the only reason why they'd talk like that is if they don't know English that well and so they interject with Spanish terms because they can't remember the English words. But typically, unless he's very, very, very Spanish and probably middle-aged (50s or 60s - younger Spaniards typically learn English very well) he wouldn't speak Spanish as much as he has right now. He would still have an accent, but probably he wouldn't be saying senor and amigo, or not very often. Does that make sense?

2. Why does it say that Alex felt awkward "in hearing Jordan's accent"? Is he awkward because Jordan is a Spaniard?

3. Make sure that you're not too repetitive when you're saying the word sword when describing the fights!

4. Hopefully that's not all we see of James in this chapter! I'm really curious to see exactly what he has in mind, and I honestly can't remember everything that he plans!

5. "Wow." Yuki commented...

Comma not period.

6. ...about it." Cher added...

Comma not period.

7. ...want do die...

I think you meant want to die

8. ...undercover." Sam corrected.

Comma not period.

9. ...all I care." Cher remarked...

comma not period.

10. Interesting. I'm not sure whether we're supposed to feel bad for Len or not, haha. I know Yuki does, maybe almost too soon, but I'm not sure if we're supposed to!

11. Wait, I'm confused. How do Anna and Jordan know each other? Is it because they're both swordsmen or is it something else that we don't know yet or that I've forgotten?

12. Okay good we get to the purple stuff now!

13. Oh that's kind of awkward haha. I wonder if there's some other way for us to show that Kim is a girl? I mean, does she really look that manly or is it just that Yuki isn't observant? Or is Kim trying to hide from everyone else too? I couldn't tell if that's what she meant by telling Yuki that that doesn't leave the room. Was she saying that he can't tell anyone else that she's a girl or was she referring to what just happened when she fell on top of Yuki?