3 chapters / 2171 words

Approximately 11 minutes to read


“People say they can predict the future. I seriously doubt they could have predicted this.”
Nobody could have guessed the predicament Aluara Townsend and the rest of her school ends up in.
See, it’s perfectly normal to have a 4.0 GPA and to go to a school for ONLY exceptionally rich and talented Gr.11’s.
It’s also perfectly normal for the most popular girl to hate her. Cliche, much? Well, yes. That's how things are supposed to be.
But that’s pretty much where the 'normality' ends.
When the school is taken over by things that call themselves ‘Clones’ because they make themselves look like a person’s twin, anything normal is whisked away, and the teens are tossed into a very crazy adventure.
First of all, all the doors, windows and escape routes suddenly disappear.
Secondly, the hallways are now patrolled by the Clones, so it’s pretty hard to go anywhere in the school.
Thirdly, the popular girl-Brienne-stills hates Aluara, and even with the help of her best friend Skyler, Aluara has a difficult time persuading Brienne to help her get them out of there.
They’ll probably all die.
Now that's Unpredictable
Remember that this is an incomplete story, and a work-in-progress. If you are confused about any parts, remember that in a real, completed novel, you eventually get an explanation. So, don't complain about being confused about how a person is acting or a situation is playing out, because everything will be explained in the end. Thank you! :)



about 4 years ago Michael Gunter said:

Interesting. I rather like it. It starts off sounding like standard fare teen-drama, then quickly becomes something really worth reading. The teen-drama opening actually makes the cool part all the more interesting. Want a review?


over 4 years ago Linda Dionne said:

Please, please, please continue! I love this!


about 5 years ago Brandon Spence said:

The first two chapters kind of remind me of a book I read called Gone by Michael Grant. I haven't read it in a long time, but the beginning was very close to that. I actually really liked it, though.


about 5 years ago Ashley Nicole said:

Gah! I wanted to know what she said to him! Pleaseeee write moreeee! c:



almost 5 years ago niicolebeth said:

saw a couple of things 1. "...is not going to win you an award. But back to the point-Skylarbelieves it's because..." you forgot a space between 'SKylar' & 'believes'. Just wanted to point it out. Also im not nit-picking, but 'But' shouldnt be used as the start of a sentence. maybe switch it to "...is not going to win you an award, but back to the ..." Again just a sugestion! A little ways down there is also "There is also that fact that the..." and I personally think it shouldve been "There is also THE fact that the..." I believe it sounds a bit more flowy. Again, a ways down this time, you wrote "Look dude, whatever you are, Mr-something-or other..." and Im unsure if you meant "whatever" as in the student was unclear if it was a man/woman/clown/thing but I actually read "whoever" and then went back and was like wait... So again you can leave or change it but it was my opinion. **Ok as for the plot line, HOLY CRAP! Can you say amazing?! Just the kid going to ash, and the chapter ending like that!? Whoa, please unblock that mind soon!


almost 6 years ago Brook Holly said:

This was really suspenseful:)My only thing is that you might want to write out any numbers from one to one hundred. Physical numbers (so like, 1, 2,3) make the reader's eyes stop and get's them caught for a sec. It would make the story flow a little more too:) There were also two things that caught my eye. One was "is is" and the other was "can't not". I know what you're trying to say, but double negatives get a little confusing as a reader. But great job over all:)