Edaline Baker Learns to Dance

Edaline Baker Learns to Dance

1 chapter / 1232 words

Approximately 6 minutes to read

Description:

In the winter of 1918, Edaline Baker doesn't know what to expect when she signs up for dance lessons with an eccentric widowed heiress.

Comments(5)

11377218_818265911603552_418669797284507027_n kat-circa

over 2 years ago Katherine Brown said:

Congratulations on being one of the winners of the winter writing contest!

Seeking light

over 2 years ago Headintheclouds said:

Hello. I'm another Linda D. referral :)

Love your writing. It was so easy to get lost in. You've got a knack for detail and I'm so glad you didn't end it with a cliffhanger. Like your use of 'winter' as a subtle theme. Best of luck in the contest and thanks for sharing.

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over 2 years ago Emma Kemp said:

Although I'm currently enjoying summer, this gave me a craving for a blazing fire and some hot chocolate :) Your descriptions are bliss, and your characters.... well, I loved every bit of it - such fantastic writing! I'm glad you included the proper pronunciation of her name (yup, I was saying it wrong), and that there was a hint of bittersweet mourning - instant depth for your characters. You've created a beautiful piece here, good luck in the comp!

Photo on 9-23-15 at 4.16 pm

over 2 years ago L. R. Bauer said:

Linda D recommended this piece to me, and I'm so glad she did; it was excellent. Your descriptions and diction were absolutely superb. I also liked the way you started the story by introducing Mrs. Donahue and then Edaline next. The little details sprinkled throughout, like Charles telling Edaline to always learn how things work, really gave this piece a lot of depth.

My only suggestion would be to include a little bit of physical description of Edaline (you went into great detail about Mrs. Donahue so then I was left wondering what Edaline looked like). I realize you do have a word limit though.

Good luck!

Reviews(2)

11377218_818265911603552_418669797284507027_n kat-circa

over 2 years ago Katherine Brown said:

Truly brilliant piece of writing. I experienced every single word as if I was Edaline Baker. When a writer can accomplish this for the reader those are the ear-markings of greatness. Well done!

Best Kat

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over 2 years ago Punk Princess said:

This is very very very beautiful! I love how you described the whole scenery and all of the people. I also love the fact that it's historical fiction as well!