Shadow and Glass

Shadow and Glass

1 chapter / 247 words

Approximately 1 minute to read

Description:

Round 1 Winner of the March Matchup Contest! “I can see her almost perfectly in this cracked darkness.”
–Paper Towns

Genres:

Writing, Short Story

Comments(2)

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over 2 years ago David Barry DeLozier said:

Wow! This is awesome. Love the imagery of the vase shattering. Your voice is compelling, the story sad but not maudlin. This subject could come off depressing but there's a nice thread of optimism in it, in the way the narrator and her sister choose to look at the situation. Great job! I look forwards to reading more of your work.

Omg

over 2 years ago Cecílie Zelenková said:

Paper Towns is, for some reason, the only John Green book I haven't read, but I constantly see quotes from it floating around the Internet and absolutely love the one you have chosen. This is a really beautiful piece! You have some truly spectacular lines in here - "polish it with her worry," "shattered and shadowed past" - and the metaphor of the vase is creative and beautiful and heartbreaking. Went through this with my grandma, so your story really resonated for me personally. Very well done.

Reviews(1)

Uta no prince sama12

about 2 years ago Anna Markovka said:

Once again, this was very well written, in my opinion. There seemed to be a sort of melancholic and yet unfeeling tone to it, which worked well with the story. I also like how you used the vase to represent their mother.

The only thing I can recommend to improve the story is to make sure you aren't redundant. What I mean by that is that the beginning of a lot of your paragraphs was "the" which becomes a bit repetitive. To fix that, you could try rewording the phrases so that they're still nice but they don't need "the" in front of them.