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Round 2 Winner of the March Matchup Contest! From something broken, many things may be built.
almost 2 years ago Tiger Cat said:
It was so unique!
about 2 years ago Cecílie Zelenková said:
This is insanely adorable :) The relationship between sisters is so well-developed in very few words. Good luck!
about 2 years ago Linda D said:
You tucked the prompt nicely into an endearing story. Well done.
Best of luck.
about 2 years ago Natalya Tamarkin said:
I liked the fact that you didn't force your story around the dialogue needed for the round 2 entry. It is very well made and original.
almost 2 years ago Anna Markovka said:
This made me smile so much! It was such a sweet little story, and I completely agree with the older sister; no one should ever grow up!
Things I found that worked for this story was the catching beginning stating that Carmen broke up with her boyfriend, and well as the quick dialogue when they were battling. If there had been description between that dialogue, I think it wouldn't have been as effective since it would have slowed the scene down a bit.
I wasn't able to find things that you could improve on, as I think this was a really well written short story! :)) But I do have a question; her parents were making waffles to celebrate Carmen's breakup? Is this true or is that how the younger sister interpreted it? Haha.