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Writing, Dystopian



6 months ago Grace Ferraro said:

that's amazing! you should get it published, beaches that is so much better than some of the books I've read lately!

Sam full (1)

8 months ago Sysanet said:

Putting this here since it's not really a review. Reread chapter one and I don't have anything else to add. It has been improved.


8 months ago Joy Tretick said:

This is such good writing! I was intrigued by the 1st chapter alone!


8 months ago Maisie Teska said:

I really liked this book. Continue to write more! Check out my book if you haven't already. Thanks!



9 months ago Sarah Richard said:

I loved how visceral your descriptions were and there was some great dialogue use. All of the little details pulled me in.I particularly loved your descriptions of energy and water consumption.

Some caution can be used when writing a popular genre. There's that saying that nothing is an original (blah, blah, blah). I saw wide sweeping attempts at plot setting I've read in other novels. There's nothing wrong with that, but I came away feeling like you didn't know where you want this to go. What would have helped me, as a reader, is further specificity. I struggled with your world building and character introductions. There's a LOT here. Honing in on it will only further enrich where you're headed.

Thank you for sharing. I appreciate that you actively seek feedback and put work out into the world! That's half the battle. Keep on being wonderful :)


9 months ago reefa said:

It seems pretty interesting so far. Like some others have mentioned before, the grammar could use a bit of work, but generally it's a good story. I like the idea of it, and it's quite enjoyable to read. However, sometimes it feels a bit wonky, if that makes sense. If you can make the story (as in paragraphs and sentences) flow together better, it would be even nicer to read. The characters are pretty nice as well, so that makes it more fun to read. Besides that, I think it would also be nice if there were more descriptions of the world and area in general, to provide a better image of the setting. I hope this helped somehow!